Flat Rabbits - why...?
We left the house on Friday for the entire day and left our dog mya in the garage when we left. We gave her a small gap with the garage door so she could have some airflow and wouldn't dehydrate. Hours earlier, while mowing my yard, I noticed a small rabbit run out from under our deck and I almost ran over it. After making a mental note to check before mowing under there in the future...I put the mower away and then packed up the family and left.
When we returned to our house that night, we opened the garage door and our dog greeted us happily as usual. I got out of the van and as I opened it up and picked up my sleeping daughter...my gaze slipped down to a large smear across the garage floor. I nearly barfed, but regained my composure long enough to put my daughter in bed and walk back down to the garage.
There on the floor was a massive rabbit that I'd run over with the van on the way into the garage. His eyes were bulging out of his head and intestines lined our garage floor under the van. I carefully pulled the van out to clean up the massive bloody pulp from my garage when I noticed a much more sinister plot unravel.
The entire floor of my garage was covered with bloody rabbit tracks and fur. The unsuspecting rabbit had crawled under the gap in the garage door and my dog had tortured it for hours. For all I know, it had been trying to escape when the garage door opened and I ran it over with the van. So not only was it tortured and mutilated by my dog, but I desecrated the body by smearing it over a 4 foot area. I couldn't help but think that it would've been better if I'd chewed it up in the lawnmower earlier that day. At least it would've been over quickly.
This is why the title to the return of my blog is "Flat Rabbit." I just kept telling myself that whatever happened to me recently was going to be the name of the new blog. I'm just glad that I didn't decide to bring the blog back last week when the only exciting thing to happen was a massive dump I took on Wednesday.
When we returned to our house that night, we opened the garage door and our dog greeted us happily as usual. I got out of the van and as I opened it up and picked up my sleeping daughter...my gaze slipped down to a large smear across the garage floor. I nearly barfed, but regained my composure long enough to put my daughter in bed and walk back down to the garage.
There on the floor was a massive rabbit that I'd run over with the van on the way into the garage. His eyes were bulging out of his head and intestines lined our garage floor under the van. I carefully pulled the van out to clean up the massive bloody pulp from my garage when I noticed a much more sinister plot unravel.
The entire floor of my garage was covered with bloody rabbit tracks and fur. The unsuspecting rabbit had crawled under the gap in the garage door and my dog had tortured it for hours. For all I know, it had been trying to escape when the garage door opened and I ran it over with the van. So not only was it tortured and mutilated by my dog, but I desecrated the body by smearing it over a 4 foot area. I couldn't help but think that it would've been better if I'd chewed it up in the lawnmower earlier that day. At least it would've been over quickly.
This is why the title to the return of my blog is "Flat Rabbit." I just kept telling myself that whatever happened to me recently was going to be the name of the new blog. I'm just glad that I didn't decide to bring the blog back last week when the only exciting thing to happen was a massive dump I took on Wednesday.
posted by neilgreathouse | 12:45 PM
1 Comments:
you're back!!! i'm sooo excited!! i'm really disappointed that you didn't let us share in the massive bm you had!
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